My Darling Daughter,
There are a few statements I say to you daily. “I love you. I like you. You are the most important part of my world. You make me happy. I am proud of you.”
In this month that celebrates mothers, indulge me for a moment while I elaborate further on why I say these love mantras so often to you: the one who made me a mom.
I love you.
In ways I didn’t know I could, I love you. I love you hard and I love you fierce.
I love the attitude I call you out on daily. Even when it makes me crazy! Your attitude shows your spirit, backbone and overflowing personality.
I love your hugs. And how they turn Mamma into a jungle gym of affection.
I love the way you project your own love back on me with innocent abandon. That you demand cuddle time upon waking up. That you always want more of it. And how you, at three, latch on to me still.
I love your funky toenail and how we have so much fun not only painting our nails together – but the magic of our impromptu finger and watercolor paint parties.
I love your creativity and your pretend play. If you ever start calling “Mom and Sweetie” it’s commonly attributed name of “playing house,” I may (covertly) shed tears.
I like you.
I promise my love will never falter. Although I will forever love you, I also promise I won’t always LIKE you. However, I think it is important to tell you that I “Like” you often, because it is the truth. Most of the time? You are an absolute joy.
So when I tell you I don’t like you at a particular moment? When you are in trouble and I’m doing the really tough part of parenting called discipline? So I don’t raise a complete jerk? I hope I’ve laid a strong enough foundation for you to understand that there is a vast difference between like and love.
You are the most important part of my world.
I am SO BLESSED to be your mom.
Being your mom is an honor I battled to achieve. I promise you I will try my best to do a knock-out job of it. Even if that means being “mean Mamma” at times. And I hope this parlays into you becoming the BEST YOU, in turn.
I want you to be happy. I want you to have passion. And to know you are always surrounded with an abundance of love.
Making this happen is more important than anything else that comes my way.
You make me happy.
Truth? I wasn’t planning on becoming a mom. Fate chose us to be partners. So I give fate a big fat kiss because you are not only the best part of my life – you also bring me a happiness I have never known.
I remember picking you up at eight months old from your seventh (I still shudder) foster placement. You latched on, cuddled in and NEVER gave a backwards glance. You knew you were with Mamma. Instantly, my heart was owned by a pair of pudgy hands, gargantuan eyebrows and amber elf eyes.
Girl, you ricocheted my life into a tailspin. And we landed in a place with so many smiles, hugs, kisses and laughter that I cannot help but marvel at my fortune. You give me purpose. You give me strength. And you make me SO happy. Daily.
I am incredibly proud of you.
You had legitimate trauma in your infancy. And yet, you are the happiest, most gregarious, inquisitive, assertive, and loving little girl.
I would be proud of you even if you had not overcome the hurdles you faced in your first months. Knowing what you have – hopefully unknowingly – achieved? Seeing you as you are today? Your security in the world makes my heart sigh with gratefulness. I am so very proud of you. For the person you are now and for who you will become.
So, my daughter, what I say? I really do mean it.
My love mantras are not platitudes. There are reams of examples for each that I won’t catalog for reasons of brevity. Don’t worry, I’ll whisper them into your ear as you sleep. I’ll recite them as we cuddle in the mornings.
Because, my sweetest girl, I love you. I like you. You are the most important thing in my world. You make me so very happy. And I am beyond proud of you.
Thank you for stealing my heart,